room4.c
I'm still not sure of the grammar of the first sentance...  it might be 
right, but it might need a comma after dead.  I keep reading it and it 
seems odd, but right, at the same time...  heh.  

There's still a concern in general though, cos if someone is coming into
the room from any direction but south, they haven't just stepped through
the green light and into the land of the dead..  They've stepped closer
to the regular world.  I know it requires a whole new desc almost, but
directional stuff like that doesn't work...

Also...  it's "mere" mortal

Listen changes
Heh..  I missed one here before..  weight is singular even if trees is 
not..  so "the dead weight of the trees 'works' further to bring them 
down"


room5.c
Third line too long now..  *8)

Room desc changes...
Again the directional thing..  some people reading this will be on 
their way out of the land of the dead...

Ya missed the space between unfortunate and travelers.


room6.c
I know what it is that bugs me about the descs..  there's no subject to 
the sentance in some of these..  this being one of them..  what or who 
is wandering?  The only noun in here is the stream, and it's not 
wandering.  I'd write "There is a stream in this part of the forest, 
but still no signs of life."  I'd do it in the other rooms too..  heh

Items changes
For creatures...  you can't see what 'they' are from this distance


room1.c
Both lines too long
No comma needed after pond
making walking difficult

Items changes
Large trees
tall and weathered.  Some are
somewhat large, and the
very filty, and one...  drink it.  Dead fish
as the pond.  It leads

Listen changes
almost like a clogged nose because of
coming has only one 'm' again
claws were scraping
hear nothing but your

Taste changes
Add comma after life
stream.  You refuse
death.  You immediately spit them out
trees taste so bad

Smell changes
The stream
The rocks smell worse...  socks.  You back
rotting fish.  Perhaps it... in it, but they


room12.c
Only the first line 1 character too long..  but if you make my changes, 
that'll change...  *8)

Room desc changes..
the path.  The scattered bones that lie in the way would make an 
inexperienced

Items changes
a lot harder, as well

Listen changes
claws scraping
Coming with only one 'm'
Hmm..  weight doesn't give way...  maybe as the tree branches give way 
from their own dead weight.
Also...  it's a crack once in a while, not awhile..
Another 2 m'd coming

Taste changes
taste clean, as though...  everything off of it
